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29 April 2006 at 18:27

progress report

The commentary on the previous post went off in some interesting directions:

Negotiations were successfully concluded for marketing the underpantaclava worldwide. That means I 'll be able to drop the agency for hotboy's literary output, which wasn't selling well anyway. Mainly because his books have too much buddhism and not enough sex. I had been looking forward to reading the manuscript of his new book Bending Over, in my hotel room. Until I realised it's all about yoga positions. Surely there's a law against misleading titles?


Mackerel Sinus gave permission for me to use one of his HNT art shots as a marital aid. And I found out that he is related to another HNTer, Lelly, but they live at opposite ends of the world and haven't met in 35 years. HNT helps families stay in touch! Even the church would surely approve.


Keda suggested, in the nicest possible way, that I'm a total wack-job. Just because I (allegedly) wrote her a letter as Sir David Attenborough, and left comments under the nom-de-plume of Alec McClochendichter! Actually, it probably wasn't just that - there's also my body of work which kind of speaks for itself.


Dudley Doright is a famous person who has the good fortune to look like me.


I scored an invitation to California, where the pantaclava market hasn't even begun to take off.





I persuaded the McDonald Institute to pay my expenses to a Photo Imaging conference, so this weekend I'm in Sydney. The expo attached to the conference has exhibits from all the big photographic companies, and each one has about 10 or 20 photo-printing machines which you can use for free. Fortunately, I've brought all my HNT and other snaps with me on memory card, so I've been printimg off blow-ups of ukulele and banana nudes. What will the UnHeard Of customs people say is they open my suitcase when I arrive back?

I'll be stuck in the hotel room on my own tonight, far from my partner. But there's a TV program on, about the World Cup team I have supported for decades (France). I'll be reliving their unfair defeat in the 1982 semi-final (on penalties!) by Germany. Thank goodness I had the good sense to bring some home brew to the hotel and chill it in the minibar. My employers don't cover alcoholic expenses.

Finally, this week I read one of the best bits of news in a long time. Research proves that men who masturbate 5 times a week are 30% less likely to get prostate cancer. So back at the hotel tonight I'll be doing my bit for men's health. What a fortunate creature I am!

Blogger hotboy said...

Adolf! Heil! Must say the last piece in this post is a lot of old wink. Winking is for winkers. Georges Simenon, who wrote the Maigret books, hanky pankied with 10,000 women in the course of his life, starting during the first world war when he was thirteen and a blackmarketeer in Belgium. He bonked his servant every day after lunch. You can do the maths yourself. 10,000. This boy had no time for winking and he died of old age. Also, as a Taoist you should know that Taoists should not ejaculate after the age of fifty, winking or not! Dearie me! What a lot of old wink. This stuff just encourages the winkers and is no help at all! Hotboy  

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Blogger Menzies Milngavie III said...

I say!

I hope you have a spiffing time at the conference.

MM III  

~

Post a Comment

27 April 2006 at 07:07

underpantaclava HNT

The weather here at this time of year is perishing. Here on UnHeard Island it has just changed from 3-jumper to 4-jumper weather.

The penguins are immune to facial frostbite, but humans need to wear an underpantaclava in bed at night to keep the ears from freezing solid.



Keda has pointed out that her kids invented the underpantaclava too. I didn't plagiarise their work - it was a simultaneous invention, and we can divide up the global market, so long as they take the northern hemisphere and I'll keep to the south.

To keep my other parts warm, I'll be visiting Mackerel Sinus's classy HNT post this week:







HNT_1

If you missed previous HNTs, you can access all the old half baked thursday posts here.

Sources acknowledged.

Blogger hotboy said...

Adolf! Heil! Nein! I know that thing caused a bit of a problem with your ear-hole eventually, but you should move on. Or back! How's about the secret dossier on the fraulein in the back seat from the old days? This Van Gogh stuff with the utilisation of inappropriate orifices is not as good as the fresh, plump girls. Just thought you'd like to hear from your fan base. It should help. Hotboy  

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Blogger keda said...

fabulous, the fashion police approve. practical and pretty.

the lets sported the big girls blouse version last month. this craze is sweeping the globe*

http://mamahog.blogspot.com/2006/03/wonderlets.html

be happy you are officially in with the dudes*  

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Blogger lecram sinun said...

That's great! Cheers and Happy HNT!  

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Blogger lecram sinun said...

Yeah, that's cool! Thanks for asking though. Dragonfly and I are both flattered.

BTW... my blog name is sort of a trbute to the reality of "Bizarro World" (ala Superman) and to dyslexia which I only found out I had at the age of 23. LOL!  

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Blogger keda said...

i NEVER said you plagriarised their idea. or that it was their invention. we actually nicked it from some boys on a visa ad! which i posted even earlier.
i merely pointed out how trendy you were!
anyway thanks for the link*  

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Blogger hotboy said...

Adolf! Zeig! I see you've added another photie! I take it the hormone therapy has started to kick in. Having breasts is bound to help during the long winter nights. Hotboy  

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Blogger robmcj said...

HB, I'll blog the dossier as soon as I receive the proofs of your new book. I think you said it was called Bending Over.

Keda, sorry about the misunderstanding. My fault.

Lecram, thanks.  

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Blogger Suze said...

Lovely snuggly shot. I guess here in the UK it is just 2 jumpers weather.

Happy HNT sweetie ;)  

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Blogger Lelly said...

You're such a nut, Rob! LOL! (Btw, Mackeral Sinus is my long-lost cousin...or did you know that?)  

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Blogger Becca said...

Love the shot :D

It emphasizes the very hot Dudley Doright chin....always had a thing for ole Dudley...  

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Blogger Lee Ann said...

I love this picture! Seems familiar..maybe I dreamt it!
Is it that cold where you are? What is 3 and 4 jumper weather?
(Is jumper referring to physically hopping or type of clothes?)
We are getting such warm weather here, it is hard to believe that it is cold anywhere!
Happy HNT!  

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Blogger Mistify said...

wow great pics, first time by so I looked thru some of the old ones and I love them...I will be stopping back by  

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Blogger miss_lissa said...

LOL
You crack me up!!
Happy HNT! ;)  

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Blogger hotboy said...

Adolf! Heil! Counting the breasts since you got the hormone therapy after last week. Three breasts? Or one fabulous shoulder. Fantastically articulated shoulder joint! Or the best breast in the world. What do you think? Does it help or not? Hotboy  

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Blogger barefoot_mistress said...

No no you look just too cold! Get out her to California at once! HHNT  

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Blogger Crimson said...

Too funny :) HHNT  

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Blogger AndyT13 said...

That's a howl! HHNT!  

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Blogger Moosekahl said...

I need that thing to hold my ice pack on my eye :)  

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Blogger Jessica said...

I really hope those are clean underpants....

Did you ever see the episode of South Park with the gnomes that went around stealing underpants late at night?


Happy HNT....  

~

Blogger robmcj said...

Suze - your blog suggests it's no-jumper weather all year at your place.

Lell - I did not know that. Which of you got into blogging or HNTing first?

Becca - I had to Google to discover Dudley Doright is a north american cartoon character - I never knew HNTing would turn out to be so educational.

LA - good memory, the pic is recycled from last year.

C-fire - thanks for stopping by, I returned the compliment.

HB - First the bending over, now the interest in pathology. I salute your new anatomical focus. Even more interesting than all that bliss stuff.

Barefoot - that's a great invitation, unfortunately I cannot leave the brewery, for obvious reasons.

Moosekahl you can place an advance order here.

Redneck - For health reasons I never wear them for a more than a week before moving them to my head.  

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Blogger Lelly said...

Rob - my cousin introduced ME to the wonderful world of blogging. I saw him ocassionally when I was a kid in Malaysia, then we returned to the UK when I was 10 and we completely lost touch.
I went back to visit Malaysia in 2003(1st time sine leaving) and hooked up with a Malaysian friend I'd met in the UK. We got talking about my (Malaysian) mother's maiden name, he said he'd been to school with someone of that name...and it turned out he knew my cousin! They'd also lost touch but he could at least tell me that he'd moved to America and was 'quite well-known in theatre'...certainly well-known enough (and with enough of an unusual name)to be Googled...which is how I tracked him down. So there you go. We haven't seen each other for over 35 years, but have a pretty good cyber friendship going on.  

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Blogger keda said...

curiouser and curiouser.... sir david/alec/rob.

now i know why you come across as such a nutjob, an adorable nutjob, but a nutjob nonetheless*

i have been considering taking similar action... but don't kbnow if i could find the time....

very interesting lelly and lecram story. tis very educational this hnt biz.  

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Blogger robmcj said...

Keda - at last, the recognition I deserve. If my family are reading this (god forbid), I would like that on my headstone - "a nutjob, an adorable nutjob, but a nutjob nonetheless"  

~

Post a Comment

21 April 2006 at 14:15

cakes and ale

Every year, skinheads all over Europe celebrate my birthday with marches or riots. Yesterday was my birthday (thanks for the song, Lee Ann, and the wishes from Menzies), so they were at it again. Why?

When I was young, my mother would bake cakes for my birthday, bless her.



I hate drinking real beer. I love the taste, but I hate the alcohol. Excessive happiness and then hangover. Yesterday I was forced to open a bottle of Beez Neez Honey Wheat Beer. I got it as a present, so I had to drink it. A smooth honey taste, but lacking in bitterness, and not a patch on the genuine German wheat beer. It was way too easy to drink, and the alcohol interfered with my sleep last night. Thank goodness I still have over 100 bottles of alcohol-free home brew to fall back on. Not literally, obviously.



This is always a busy time of year for me. Last weekend was the 12th anniversary of meeting my beloved partner. She and I often use this date as an excuse to review the preceding year, and brainstorm some ways to make the next year better. At various times this year, each of us has been through occasional "difficult" spells. As one does.

To make the next year better, my partner came up with this magic formula for happiness:

"When I'm feeling bad, all you need to do is pay some attention to me.

And when you're feeling bad, all you need to do is pay some attention to me." ©

It's so simple! I'll let you know if I give it a try.

PS - looking into my stats for yesterday, I see somebody went to the trouble of translating my page into Spanish. Also, I'm still getting about 40 extra hits per day from an old tattoo picture I posted last year. And repeated hits are coming from one of MM's old comments that contained a link to a rabbit bestialising a chicken. Well done MM!

Sources acknowledged.

Blogger Lee Ann said...

Sorry about the brew making you feel good...then bad!
That is awesome that someone made your blog Spanish! So cool.
Hope you have a super weekend Rob.  

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Blogger hotboy said...

Adolf! Heil! My stay in the lonely financial zone will cease now that you have posted a photie of your mum at last. I'll sneak up on her and it her over the head for ten percent off the top of the inheritables. That's got to help! Hotboy  

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Blogger hotboy said...

Your partner's recipe for happiness is superb!We should all be like that! Resist having it tattooed on you however, if I were you. In fact,toughen up, Adolf! Get on the jackboots. It's dog eat dog. Yeah, give in. You don't stand a chance. Resistance is futile. Lie prone. That might not help, but it could be relaxing. Hotboy  

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Blogger keda said...

i am now 100% confusion in a skirt.

why would anyone translate you intospanish fer gawds sake????

hitler????

help i must be tireder than i thought.

happy birthday darlin. and well done on 12 years, with a formula like that you will be sited in the textbooks as the only couple to make it past the 00's without seperating*  

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Blogger Lee Ann said...

Hehe, did you like my singing?
Let me know if your partner's formula works!  

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~

Anonymous Anonymous said...

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Anonymous Anonymous said...

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make extra money  

~

Anonymous Anonymous said...

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make some nice extra cash secret shopping. Just go to the site below
and put in your zip to see what's available in your area.
I made over $900 last month having fun!
make extra money  

~

Post a Comment

20 April 2006 at 08:18

HNT/FNT double puzzle

My Northern Hemisphere friend hotboy is a self-confessed fat basturn. To work off the excess flab caused by drinking beer, he uses a patented system called the Beer Monster Reduction Vehicle.

Here in the Southern Hemisphere, I'm a skinny basturn, so I used the beer diet to try and put on some pounds. Naturally, it didn't work, and I even lost weight - I had forgotten that North is the opposite of South, and everything has to balance up. I may ask hotboy to send me a Beer Monster Reduction Vehicle. On crossing the Equator, it would convert into a Beer Monster Inflation Vehicle. I could use it to pack on some weight Down Under.

This photo was taken recently, after six months on the beer diet.





HNT_1

If you missed previous HNTs, you can access all the old half baked thursday posts here.

Blogger Becca said...

You gotta love a good puzzle..

HHNT!!  

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Blogger keda said...

great!

hey you don't look so different. just need a bit of a tan and a wax is all!

and i love the puzzle. happy hnt babe and welcome back*  

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Blogger hotboy said...

Adolf! Zeig! Thank god you chopped the head of those photies! Anyway, it's reminded me never to take my simmit off! From these photies you can't tell if you're a dwarf or not! A real size person standing next to you would help. Also, just because of the problem with the Third Reich and the calvinist toilet training ... well, you didn't have to chop it off, that's all. It doesn't help. Hotboy  

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Blogger Phoenixboi said...

Great puzzle!! Happy HNT  

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Blogger Wenchy said...

Gotta love the bandaid!  

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Blogger HNB said...

Hate the bandaid. It's in the way. You look great. The puzzle was loads of fun. HHNT  

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Blogger . said...

I would LOVE to get in my jeaqns from half my age. UGH! HHNT  

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Blogger Suze said...

That puzzle was fantastic. Now how do we remove the plaster (bandaid)?


Happy HNT ;)  

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Blogger Polt said...

Whether it's recent or half your age, you still pretty damn hot, dude!

Loved the puzzle!

Happy Birthday and HNT!  

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Blogger Shora said...

HELLO! Love the puzzle. And Happy Birthday!  

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Blogger barefoot_mistress said...

Oh now that was a fun puzzle! HHNT~  

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Blogger Solitaire said...

How fun is that! Thanks for stopping by!

HHNT!  

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Blogger Crimson said...

Very nice :) Fun puzzle!  

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Blogger Lelly said...

Happy Birthday Rob...you look great in both pics, but I'm guessing the 'tanned' one is the earlier shot. HHNT!  

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Blogger miss_lissa said...

luvin the bright pink bandaid..

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!


I read back and read stories of how you got the scar.

Le Chat's friend Faith is also going thru a cancer battle at the moment and could use some encouragement ~you can get to her blog thru le Chat(I'm fairly sure you know who le Chat is.. ;) )
my own scare was 5 yrs ago, and with Ovarian Cancer. I'm now missing 1/3 of my left ovary and I look at my scars every day and count my blessings as I'm sure you do as well.

Anywhoo... happy HNT  

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Blogger Lil Bit said...

weeeeeeeee! What fun w/the lil puzzle!
I'd say top is 1/2 age, but what dif does it make? - who duhn't luv a man in his bday suit? ;)

Happy HNT & Bday! =)  

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Blogger Aisha T. said...

Well, that was fun *grin* happy HNT--the bandaids are priceless.  

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Blogger Lee Ann said...

Both pictures look great Rob...you look really good!
Great puzzle, love the camera effect.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR ROB, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! Could you hear me singing as I was typing? Have a wonderful special day!
~xo  

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Blogger Bellarosa said...

I love puzzles!!

Happy HNT  

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Blogger lecram sinun said...

Hmmm... Puzzling... but Happy Birthday! Cheers and Happy HNT!  

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Blogger Menzies Milngavie III said...

I say!

A fine figure of a man.

Happy birthday.

MM III  

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Blogger Carslemane Foraix said...

G'day Robbo. Just thought you should know that someone has printed out both your pictures and stuck them in the dunny. I'd be worried about that, if I were you.  

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Blogger Moosekahl said...

Congrats on the maintenance. I'm far from the size I was when I was half my current age but I much prefer my current size and shape then the old me. Happy HNT  

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Post a Comment

18 April 2006 at 17:36

after the long weekend, let the holidays commence

Just back from a 4-day holiday with our dog at Mrs. Omar's beachside shack. We were looking after her tripe-hound while she was away at the Flat Island Folk Festival.

Panda and Stu and their dog joined us for a couple of days, so it was dog pandemonium. Because of my Aryan background, the animals view me as the top dog - this means I get to shout at someone who actually takes some notice. But leadership is a big responsibility, as I discovered in my previous life too.

Spud's brother, Usuff, has a dark room in the cottage, where he photographs geometric patterns, using a camera and a torch on 2 swinging pendulums.

This is one of the pictures he made.


And here's how he does it:


There are more pictures, and if you want to know how he works out the right timing for swinging the pendulum, here's an example of his calculations. I don't understand it, but you might.

The long weekend was action-packed - we walked the pack of dogs for hours along the shore, swam in an icy sea pool, and watched lifesavers rescuing two half-drowned swimmers from the big surf. As we arrived at the beach, the boats were out looking for the second guy. The first guy was lying unconscious on the sand, and his swimming trunks had somehow fallen down around his knees during the rescue. I had my camera in my hand, and it would have made a dramatic HNT photo, but I decided to show some sensitivity for once in my life.

So instead, here's a picture of Buster and Lucy after they joined in the surf rescue and nearly drowned each other.


And here's my dog rock-hopping. She's an Australian sheepdog, can you see the kangaroo influence?


Back home now, and tired from all the activity and sea air, thank goodness I've still got 2 weeks off work, so I can take things real easy and put the finishing touches to this Thursday's FNT post. What a fortunate creature I am!

Now it's time to read and answer the backlog of comments that arrived while I was away.

Blogger Lee Ann said...

Sounds like you had a wonderful time. The dogs are precious and are having so much fun. That geometrical shape is beautiful!
Glad you are back :)  

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Blogger hotboy said...

Adolf! Zeig! The photie of the shapes is good, but I'm glad I don't have a camera (or a watch, or a motor). I wouldn't mind a dog. I've only got a dog's name. Jetsun. It should be the name of a travel company, but what the hell. It doesn't help at all! Hotboy  

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Blogger hotboy said...

Adolf! Zeig! Reading about you being on holiday still is no use! I'm saving mine up for the summer and have to go in for a day and a half this week! What a liberty! Work is no help at all. Hotboy  

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Blogger Neotropism said...

Man those shape thingies are awesome. Nice dogdogs too.

Neo  

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Blogger robmcj said...

Neo, welcome!

The photographer guy is working on a computer program to produce the same shapes.  

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Post a Comment

13 April 2006 at 13:12

FNT deferred

Oops! The Flat-island Fundamentalist has let the cat out of the bag. Now anyone can get access to the ultimate wisdom:

"Pretending to be normal is crap. It is also too expensive." ©

Once you learn the truth of that, you know everything.

If I was a normal (i.e. what he would call a flatheid), I would be excited about going away this Friday for 4 days, to visit Spud's mum at the beach. No work, just loafing and taking nude photos of myself, for 4 whole days! But in fact for someone like me, a reformed pretend-normal, it's all just continuous life, whether at home (where I blog whenever I want) or at work (where I also blog whenever I want). It's all just life. You're alive so what does it matter where you do the living?

This week, I have laid on exams for every single class. That keeps them quiet, and lets me get on with this. What a fortunate creature I am!

Of course, after the weekend, when I start a further 2 weeks' holiday (What a fortunate creature I am!), I'll need to spend some of my time marking the exams. Everything balances up, there's no boundary between work and life. If you do it right, it's all just life.

What a fortunate etc ....!




I know how many people this will disappoint, but my return to full HNT form (to be precise, it'll be FNT) has been delayed another week because Spud's mum, bless her, doesn't have a PC. Spud was going to buy her one, until he realised she'd be able to send him email. As it is, she sometimes phones Carslemane just to make sure Spud's changing his undies every week, whether they're dirty or not.

Blogger keda said...

oh you old tease. sand in yr sarnies to you!  

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Blogger hotboy said...

Adolf! Heil! God, no more dirty photies of the old guy! Stormtroppen Rhinemaidens in jackboots, yes! Old geezers lolling around in the non-alcoholic ale ... no use. This should help. Hotboy  

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Blogger Lee Ann said...

Hope you have some relaxing times!  

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Blogger hotboy said...

Adolf! Heil! Ubertruths lie in the profundities of this post! You're right. You must glide from your jobbie into your otherwise as if there were no divisions.Seemlessness. Or shock horror: what the fung am I doing here?!! Is that the Tao? Gliding without bumps between this scenario and that? Yes, but I don't get what I perceive as the moral vacuum. Why is Casanova a good Taoist? Why should you follow your Tao if it is to be a basturn? You see, Adolf, I don't undertand this Taoism at all. Please elucidate. I think this might have been a Taoist post-modernist post. Of course, this won't help at all. Hotboy  

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Blogger hotboy said...

Adolf! I would like to offer my body for offering up. There is nothing left except the offering up. Of everything, including my leg. How much are you offering? Food and food would be good. I don't mind being servile, as long as I can kill them while they sleep, the basturns. I can kill your mother. How much? Just thought it would help. Hotboy  

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Blogger robmcj said...

HB - how much to just rough her up a little? You could wear the boxing gloves and just knock a few teeth out. Don't leave any fingerprints. That would really help.  

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Post a Comment

12 April 2006 at 19:15

why doesn't everyone?

While hotboy can't believe that everyone doesn't want to meditate, I can't believe that everyone doesn't have a blog. I try to tell people how blogging could benefit them, but nobody takes any notice.

If all my friends had blogs, then we could keep in touch in that special reciprocal bloggy way. Mind you, first I'd have to make some face-to-face friends, and that's never going to happen here in the UnHeard Of Islands.




A couple of my colleagues at the McDonald Institute,
deliberately ignoring my advice to start blogging.

Blogger hotboy said...

Adolf! Heil! Everyone has ignored my advice to meditate immediately so that you will land all the quicker into ra bliss, and I must say I find this strange. Noboby is interested in ra bliss at all! It's amazing! Hotboy  

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Blogger Lee Ann said...

Funny, but some people just don't get it..blogging!
Boyfriend is a computer geek, but definitely not a blogger!
Too bad, I say!  

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Blogger robmcj said...

LA - but he seems to be a good photographer.  

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Blogger Lee Ann said...

Thank you Rob. He is a genius with computers, but a novice in photography! He is learning though! ;)  

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Post a Comment

11 April 2006 at 07:53

visit scotland

Scotland seems to be making world headlines these days. Top-ranking country for single motherhood, female violence and childhood obesity. And as of this week, the country is now officially a bird flu zone. Yet still some people say Scotland isn't world-class.

To promote Scotland to foreign tourists, there's now a government web site . It lists some of the many other reasons for visiting Scotland. Here are two photos from the website, visitscotland.com.




This photo of tourist accommodation is captioned: "Remember to bring your earplugs in case of snoring room-mates."

In Scotland, smoking used to be the most popular way to reduce family size. But since smoking was banned (except in your own home), picnicking under an overhanging caravan is now the recommended culling method.



But I still love visiting Scotland, mainly because of the great people and the country lifestyle. According to the BBC, if it wasn't for the Scottish Highlands, the tradition of sheep-shagging might have died out long ago.


picture of sheep dating festival

Post a Comment

07 April 2006 at 20:08

whoopee

I was going to be rich. At work I have one of these fake leather chairs that makes a farting noise when you move. Then last week I read that a teacher in England is suing her employer for £1m because her chair at work lets out a farting noise every time she sits down, and they refused to replace it.


"It was very embarrassing to sit on," she said. "I asked for a chair that didn't make these very embarrassing farting sounds. I regularly had to apologise that it wasn't me, it was my chair."

If the English case succeeds, it will set a legal precedent. When I mentioned this to the colleague who shares my office, she pointed out that it's not my chair making the noises, it's me.

Blogger Menzies Milngavie III said...

I say Mr RobMcJ!

Pretty quiet here, since you stopped exposing yourself every Thursday, what?

You're obviously a man of the world.

What do you recommend for, how should I put this...termites in the...dish?

Put it another way - what's the equivalent - for the technological gizmos - of a strong MGT?

MM III  

~

Blogger robmcj said...

MM - Sorry to hear of the white ants in the works. I think that's what you said. If it's a dial-up dish, you could filling it with broadbeans. Most people find the conversion process dead easy, but hampered by a lifetime's experience in I.T. and an inability to think in the microsoft way, I made a dog's thingy of it, the first few tries.

Does that help at all?  

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Blogger hotboy said...

Adolf! Zeig! Is this us back to the toilet training again? Could you try further up the body. It would really help. Is scatalogical a word? Hotboy  

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Blogger keda said...

the ever fabulous keiran (over at full stop here: http://thefullstop.blogspot.com/2006/03/top-trumps.html#links) wrote a very funny peice about this too!
i think you'd like him. he also had a good chat with god the otherday....

the last 3 posts were all very welcome. smiles help on rainy days.

keep it up babe. and i'll be checking my red dots over sydney so don't go slacking now!  

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Post a Comment

at 08:25

help

President George W Bush told Palestinian ministers that God had told him to invade Afghanistan and Iraq - and create a Palestinian State, according to a BBC TV series.

Nabil Shaath, Palestinian Foreign Minister in 2003, told of his 2003 meeting with Bush:

"President Bush said to us: 'I'm driven with a mission from God. God would tell me, "George, go and fight those terrorists in Afghanistan." And I did, and then God would tell me, "George, go and end the tyranny in Iraq …" And I did. And now, again, I feel God's words coming to me, "Go get the Palestinians their state and get the Israelis their security, and get peace in the Middle East." And by God I'm gonna do it.'"

I was hoping this might be a joke, maybe a delayed April Fool, but it checks out. I hadn't realised things were quite this bad.

And now I'm even wondering if this joke I heard about Bush is really a joke at all: unkind people say that Bush doesn't understand anything about world geography, but as soon as his staff told him about bird flu, he gave the order to bomb the Canary Islands and Turkey.

Sources acknowledged.

Blogger Lee Ann said...

Unbelievable, huh!  

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Blogger Lelly said...

Aaaaargh gh fgh!  

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Anonymous redneck said...

This blog has been reported to the Department from Homeland Security... Messiah Bush is not a joke...  

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Blogger Carslemane Foraix said...

G'day Robbo. 'Penguin Piss' may not be the winning brand name you originally thought it would be.  

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Blogger robmcj said...

Carse - your tactical thinking is wasted in Queensland. Come over to the islands and I'll make you Minister of Defence.  

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03 April 2006 at 12:44

the unheard scream

Now I know what I want for my birthday. A screambody, a "wearable space for screaming".

When a user needs to scream but it is just not socially acceptable, they can scream into this soundproof backback. And the Screambody records the scream so you can take it home with you and release it safely where nobody will object.

It's a bit expensive to buy, but cheaper and healthier than using drugs, and easier than meditation.







There's also a video (or Quicktime version for faster download).

Blogger hotboy said...

Adolf! Zeig! The scream idea is a great one! Why didn't I think of that? But it's made me confident that I'll be able to sell loads of the Beer Monster Reduction Vehicle - Power it YOurself!- pretty soon. Also, all that silent screaming (the way of the petty bourgeois!)can't be good for you. Much easier than meditating, but ... and this might not be helpful ... where does ra bliss come in? Hotboy  

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Blogger robmcj said...

Agreed, but in 1989 the Samye Ling folk realised that they would have preferred silent screaming. Ask them.  

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Blogger Lee Ann said...

That screambody is a cool idea. I haven't screamed in so long (well, except for the time when someone snuck up on me and scared me half to death).
When is your birthday Rob?  

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Blogger robmcj said...

LA - thanks for asking about my birthday.  

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Blogger Menzies Milngavie III said...

I say!

I thought that the termites had got into the dish, as that video took ages to load, but it played eventually.

No real need for it hereabouts. Screaming is perfectly acceptable for musungus.

So - it was YOU in the next door cell in Eskdalemuir in the early-to-mid eighties.

MM III  

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Blogger Carslemane Foraix said...

G'day. What has Hotboy got sticking up out of the roof of his hut?

I think he's spying on your side of the island, Robbo. You need to get some high tech Robbo. this won't do.  

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Blogger Menzies Milngavie III said...

I say, Mr RobMcj!

I found this extraordinary snap, not one of my own of course, of a truck in Pakistan, and thought you might appreciate it:

http://www.reiseblogger.de/motorradnomaden/images/pakistantruck.JPG.

MM III  

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